My good friend is a recovering alcoholic. She’s been sober for a few years but rarely talks about it and I don’t think many people know her story. We live in a community where many social situations revolve around alcohol (moms wine nights, happy hours at the pool, etc.). I notice that she tends to decline social situations, particularly the ones that involve alcohol. … Read More »
Dear Tatiana: My concern relates to my 13-year old daughter and the amount of food she consumes. It doesn’t have to do with her weight, although she is chubby, it has to do with the quantity of food, especially junk food and the sneaking of food. She is highly active and I am sure hungry often.… Read More »
Tatiana Matthews, LPC
tatiana@theahaconnection.com
My parents are getting a divorce after 40 years. How do I tell my five year old?
Anonymous
Dear Anonymous,
Use the least amount of words to express the facts in a simple and age appropriate way. Don’t provide too much information and respond to any questions in a similar fashion. Be prepared to provide emotional and physical comfort depending on the needs of the child.… Read More »
Tatiana Matthews, LPC
tatiana@theahaconnection.com
One of my daughter’s friends at school (college) is bulimic. She (the friend) has admitted to being bulimic in the past but said she was over it. It has come to my daughter’s attention and other friends that she is still bulimic. How should my daughter approach her to see if she can help?… Read More »
Tatiana Matthews, LPC
tatiana@theahaconnection.com
My 10 year old daughter lies and takes my things without asking to send me on a “goose chase” when I need to use them. The other day she used my most expensive perfume that I could smell all the way downstairs. I approached her and asked if she used it and she denied it.… Read More »
My 18 year old son has no interest whatsoever in driving. He has his learners permit, has taken a driving course and did well with the course. He’s afraid of having a car accident and killing someone. I’ve tried to talk to him and reassure him. Can you please help me? Thanks!
Concerned Mom
Dear Concerned Mom,
It’s normal for a young adult to be apprehensive when he or she is attempting a new task, especially one that could result in a life or death outcome.… Read More »
How does one make new friends as an adult if they don’t go to church? I’m a single mom of 2, introverted and in need of some friends.
Anonymous
Dear Anonymous,
Single or married, introverted or extroverted, feelings of loneliness and social isolation are common for many adults. You are not alone. Social media frequently compounds those feelings by creating a skewed sense of reality and inappropriate expectations of what our lives are “supposed to look like.” … Read More »
My 16 1/2 yr old daughter wants a tattoo and cartilage piercing. I really don’t want her to get one but she is adamant —ugh! I know there could be worse things! Also she says when she turns 18 she is getting a tattoo and there is nothing I can do about it. Would love all the advice.… Read More »
How old should a girl be to get her ears double pierced?
-Anonymous
Dear Anonymous,
The answer is whenever her parents feel like it’s appropriate. Your daughter’s frontal lobe (the part of our brain where our decision making ability comes from) won’t be fully developed until she is 25 at the earliest. She needs to borrow yours in the meantime.… Read More »
How do you handle talking about money and your future with money if your spouse never likes to talk about it. He says we are on the same page, but our financial strain tells differently. I want to be able to have a meaningful conversation and I get nowhere.
Thanks,
Anonymous
Dear Anonymous,
When you observe male animals in the wild, they have a natural instinct to protect.… Read More »
Tatiana Matthews
tatiana@theahaconnection.com
Dear Tatiana,
My high school student often does not do his homework or study for tests. Consequently, his grades are poor. I try to let him take responsibility, but he seems to not care. Should I nag and micromanage his school work, or let him fail? He does better when I get involved and remind him to do his work, but how can I get him to take the initiative to do well (or at least adequately) in school?… Read More »
Tatiana Matthews LPC
tatiana@theahaconnection.com
Dear Tatiana,
My son admitted to vaping marijuana a few times. How should we handle?
Signed,
Anonymous
Dear Anonymous,
Your job is to respond unemotionally, non-judgmentally, sticking to the facts and the natural consequences. Start with validating the value of his honesty and how that impacts trust in your relationship with him. If he understands that freedom and trust goes hand in hand, he may be more motivated to continue to be honest.… Read More »
Dear Tatiana,
Is it normal for a man not to kiss? Why would someone not kiss ever (his wife)?
Signed,
Asking for a friend
Dear Asking for a friend,
No, it’s not normal for a married man not to kiss his wife ever. There are multiple reasons why this may be occurring. Many men with un-diagnosed Autism Spectrum Disorders struggle with physical intimacy (there is a great book that talks about this called 22 Things a Woman Must Know if She Loves a Man with Asperger’s Syndrome written by Rudy Simone), as well as men who have been sexually abused, who are struggling with their sexuality or who may be unhappy in their marriage.… Read More »
We’re starting something new during Spring Break week and depending on the response over the next few weeks we will keep this going! Tatiana Matthews MS, LPC, CRC is not “Dear Abby” but rather a Dunwoody resident, mom of 2 and more importantly, a Licensed Professional Counselor.
Basically, we are going to publish anonymously, one weekly question submitted by an Aha!… Read More »
Tatiana Matthews
tatiana@theahaconnection.com
